new year!

we all have faces that haunt us at night....and when things stretch too far...then, in the days.
bad day indeed....it only unfolded to prove how less important i am for certain people, im concerned abt. mum informed me that im psychotic and reprehensible. i got acquainted with inexplicable jealousy, directed towards me by of a woman i have gone out of my way to help many a times. a baby who is the center of my personal universe declared that he doesn't enjoy spending time with me, i give benefit of doubt to him though because i hit him today after he suggested, that the woman who i had a row with, is much better than me, he made these horrifying confessions in that woman's presence....i was drenched in a blue-green wrath...and forced all my strength in slaps....blasphemy indeed..'cause the smacks had changed my life in a mini-way....hated myself for having thrashed the baby for his innocence. rich came in handy and very helpful in those trying times. now my temples are throbbing, and i feel completely drained and washed out...a lot of emotional stir dries me out...doesn't suit me. those slaps will haunt me for years ...have accumulated bad karmas ...enough to mess-up my many todays n tomorrows

a year that comes has to go!

- Hands are icy cold while trotting on the keyboard. But you cant type wearing gloves. How unnecessary are winters from my point of view. M i weather obsessed? yes, I am. Here's one obsession i cant do much about. Its Jan beginning....almost 2 more months to go. sun and sand....sea and sweat....straw strewn hut.....wind blowing ferociously making sounds....will i go without living my dreams? I shall not let that be.

- Few boys were walking on a more or less empty silent road......almost like seeing this image through a rice paper...i mean, as misty an evening as that. Clad in layers and layers of clothes. What motivates them to live on? What are they looking forward to? They are looking forward to things that their ancestors looked forward to in their primes and stuff their predecessors would wait for. Silly ....this world doesnt offer any novelty.

- I couldnt see Johnson's talc in the bathroom after vinni had bathed...so i put the jasmine talc that i use. Vinni immediately said ' it smells like bhopal' . concept of associating effects with time and places. His innocence is googly-woogly-wush.

- The librarian said ' A to jaid of office dynamics'. Oh no! no...no..no! "jaid"?? "jaid?" .what a dampener!!...what a dead rap!! did he say "office" or "ophice"? What does it prove....? it proves that i pay more attention to superficial stuff. It matters to me how people look, smell and speak. It's ok if they dont wear brands but they should wear clean stuff, its ok if they dont have an X-effect on women but must spare people the horror of that atrocious body odour, do not speak hindi in anglicized manner and vice-versa. doeskin look too much to me to look out for but who can tell u for sure how u should think?